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Testing People in Relationships and the Death of Commitment

Beloved of God, testing people slowly erodes your ability to commit. When you are always checking if someone will stay, you never fully stay yourself. Your heart remains half packed, always ready to leave if the test does not go as expected. This posture creates emotional instability, even when the relationship is healthy.

Testing also distorts how you interpret effort. When someone shows consistency, sacrifice, or patience, your mind questions the motive instead of receiving the gift. You begin to believe that commitment must be proven endlessly, rather than nurtured intentionally. This makes it difficult to believe anyone can truly choose you.

From the other side, the person being tested begins to feel that nothing they do is enough. Their effort is no longer an expression of love, but a response to pressure. Over time, commitment becomes exhausting, not joyful. People do not withdraw because they lack love, but because they feel unseen and untrusted.

God calls us to commitment rooted in covenant, not performance. When testing replaces belief, commitment becomes conditional. “Let your yes be yes” as Matthew 5:37 teaches us. A divided heart cannot build a secure relationship.

Assessment
Do I allow myself to fully commit, or am I always waiting for a reason to withdraw?

Prince Victor Matthew 

Hope Expression Values You 

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